Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Wiz Wit, Please

It's time for the annual pilgrimage to south Philly for our summer cheesesteak fix. Much like being strung out on smack, it seems that a prolonged period of no cheesesteaks is having a detrimental effect on my health, in that I am actually shitting normally for a change but experiencing severe withdrawal symptoms, like fever, chills, and stomach pain. Well, maybe the Lyme disease is kicking in again. Yes,kids, It's time for the Pats vs. Geno's showdown, 2008. The idea is to get a wiz wit from both Pats and Genos, wolf them down one after the other and determine the winner. Having a clean bathroom within a 20 minute radius is essential if you really want the wiz wit's. It can get nasty. If I decide at the last minute to chicken out of the authentic wiz wit experience, I'll go for the traditional provolone without, a less deadly choice. The last several years Pats emerged as the winner, will Joey Vento/Genos be able to pull a major upset this year? Sure it will pull an upset, it will upset my stomach!! Let me tell you, the last wiz wit I ate resulted in the foulest, nastiest dump i've ever had that very evening. The stench was so bad I almost vomited. It's the wiz, dammit. That freakin synthetic goop is essentially undigestible.

Hot on the heels of the cheesesteak run will be the annual Potts Doggie run as a prelude to Musikfest. Yes, it's that time again. My how time flies. It seems like only yesterday I was commenting on the scantily clad, big titted teenage sluts. Once Musikfest is over, you know summer is pretty much over. The days are already getting shorter. The stores might as well put the Xmas stuff out now.


Blogger George Smith said...

I thought I had a pretty strong stomach but that post put even me off. There's a place called Luigi Ortega's on Colorado, two or three blocks from me, and they have a complete menu of Philly cheese steaks. However, you have to ask for the wiz; it's not the default option. Now I'm not going to be able to eat there for a month.

5:56 PM  
Blogger Dip said...

We achieved the impossible...a cheesesteak trifecta!! After Pats and Geno's, we headed to Jim's for yet a third reek. And the winner is....
I'd say Pat's and Jim's tied, and Geno's definitely in last place. Fuck Genos there was hardly any meat. Pat's had the best roll, and Jim's had the tenderest meat. Put the Jim's meat onto the Pat's roll and you got the ultimate. Time to open Dips Steaks.

11:20 AM  
Blogger Stooge Moe said...

What a delightful evening that was. Pure cheese steak heaven.

I would have to vote Jim's number one, by a light margin over Pat's. The only thing holding back Jim's is their somewhat stingy allocation of meat and their sloth like service. But the meat is top notch. Nothing else can compare.

If you need a cheese steak fast, then Pat's is the place. Within a few seconds of your order, a fresh cheese steak comes sliding out for you to devour. The meat's a bit greasy, but tasty. And the atmosphere of eating it al fresco can't be beat. And if you're alone, there's plenty of pidgeons to keep you company.

Geno's definitely was at the bottom. It wasn't even close. The amount of meat was less than Jim's and it wasn't anywhere as good as Pat's. Vento's a hack and tries to make up for it with the flashy lights, but should be making pizza instead.

Now the real treat was a visit to Chubby's a couple weeks later after the guitar show. I had a cheese steak earlier at lunch, so for dinner, it was a hot pork sandwich. This is the best pork sandwich I have ever had! It was so succulent, it just melted in your mouth. It was so good, I had to buy a t-shirt to proclaim how great this place is. Long live pork!

9:23 AM  
Blogger Dip said...

Chubby's and Dalassandro's right across the street from each other....yeah yeah....now that just smokes the Genos/Pats thing hands down!! Hit Dalassandro's for a cheesesteak, and top it off with a succulent Pork sandwich for dessert at Chubbys!!

4:32 PM  

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