Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Dog Rant

I know i'm gonna get in a lot of trouble with this one, but here it goes.
I can't for the life of me figure out just what the hell people see in dogs. And I don't mean hot dogs. I mean the animal kind. Sorry, but I just don't get it. That will be the day I want some stinky animal smelling up my house, cleaning up their shit, and having them constantly annoy you "oh pet me, pet me". I do not need to be loved by a dog. I do not need a dog as a friend, I have plenty of human friends.
I've been seeing this chick who has two dogs. They are the most annoying things i've ever encountered. After like 5 minutes i'm ready to shoot the damn mutts. As soon as you walk up to the door, the barking starts. I've been there like 100 times, and still when I show up, they bark like they've never seen me before. Shut the fuck up!! They're constantly running around the house and begging for attention. If someone walks by outside, they start running toward the door, and the barking starts again. This goes on all night. And you can't tell me they don't stink, either. I can smell them as soon as I walk in. The freakin dog hair is everywhere, too.
It gets all over your clothes. I'm sure some of that dog hair came from their anal region, right after they just took a steamy dump, too. This chick says they are "so cute", but then all she does is shush them away and complains about them, too. Why do you have them, then??
You can't even sit down and watch TV without the stupid dogs trying to climb on you, climb on the couch, or bark at someone outside. It's a constant, never ending nuisance. If I lived there i'd shoot the damn things after about 10 minutes or go insane. But I don't live there, and don't plan to, either. It's not a trivial issue, either. She wants to live together?? Either the dogs go, or I go.

So there, dog lovers. Dogs suck. It definitely limits your luck with chicks, since most of them love the things. They're like children substitutes. "Oh, I need something to pet". Pet my dick. If you need to be loved by a dog, you need professional help, or you'd better work on your human relationships. If you like them as pets, then train the damn things to not be so annoying. Yeah, you have a right to own a dog. Just keep them outta my face and off my lawn, or they're fair game for target practice. And for godsakes, shut them up. It's amazing to me that people will clean up another animals shit. People are stupid.


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