Frozen Pizza Blues

Let's face it, a big staple of my diet is frozen pizza. Fresh pizza is the other main staple. But in a pinch, it's nice to just pop in a few slices in the toaster oven and enjoy a snack.

Now what bothers me is the frozen pizza's of today are just NOT AS GOOD as the ones from 20, 30 years ago. Why is that??

There were 3 frozen pizzas that I used to get in the 70's and 80's.....ELLIOS, BUITONI, and ROMAN. Of course you can still buy Ellios, but as everyone knows, another company bought the name and the pizza AINT THE SAME. Just the box is. Buitoni used to be my favorite. It was a square pie and the sauce and cheese were awesome. The Roman pizza was round, single serving size but they were damn good. All of them were good.

Now, i've done some research. It seems that the original Ellios formula can now be found in BETZIOS pizza. Look it up. Now BETZIOS is hard to find, however, we are in luck, as the company makes a load of "store brand" pizzas that are the same thing. Lo and behold, the "ACME" frozen pizza is actually Betzios, which is actually the original Ellios. Got it??

I found some Betzios and tried it. It's close to the original Ellios, but not quite the same. But as close as you'll get. Way closer to the original Ellios than the current Ellios.

Why McCain changed the Ellios formula is a mystery to me. That's like new Coke or something.

Now, as Buitoni and Roman are mere tasty memories, what is around now to take their place??

We have Stouffers French Bread Pizza, not bad. It seems like the cheeze never melts on these things (the cheeze gets dehydrated, or "freezer burnt" too fast).
You have Tombstone, Tonys, Celeste, DiGiorno, Freschetta, and Red Baron. I've tried them all. The Red Baron Deep Dish are not bad. Tonys you can get at WalMart for a buck. Freschetta and DiGiorno are too expensive, hell, for $7 i'll get a goddam fresh pie!!

None of them are as good as Buitoni and Roman used to be. Why is that??

I guess i'll be heading to Acme to get some REAL Ellios pizza. Acme Brand.